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Today is your first birthday. I am so happy and overjoyed, but you wouldn't believe the amount of tears I have shed over this day. Because everyday that crept closer to your birthday was a day that you grew older, another day bringing you closer to your future and further away from being my little baby. 

Since being your mummy I have learned one very important thing: I need you far more than you will ever need me. Yes I feed you, clothe you, kiss away the tears. But your smiles feed me, your little arms wrap around me better than a cashmere shawl and your laughter dusts away all the sadness I may ever have.

I wanted to write you a poem for your birthday. But what could be said anew when mothers have been writing poems for their children for centuries? How could I put into words our unique bond, the strength of my love for you? Then I thought. I will simply write down the words I whisper to you every single night. Words that are just for you and I as you finish nursing. A goodnight mantra to carry you through the night. 

I love you higher than the mountains, deeper than the seas and wider than the skies. I will do everything in my power to always keep you happy, healthy and safe from harm. 

I love you more than I can possibly put into words. More than the breath in my lungs or the beat of my heart. 

You are my reason for living. 

My happy thought.

My pure joy. 

I hope you've had a fun day. I had fun being with you and everyday I wake up in the morning I'm so happy and thankful that I get to be your mummy. I can't believe how lucky I am that you are my little boy. You bring so much happiness and joy into our lives. 

Thank you. 

I hope you have a lovely, long sleep filled with happy dreams that make you smile and giggle. But if you wake up afraid then don't worry because mummy and daddy will just be downstairs or in the room next door, watching over you. We'll always be watching over you.

I love you Harrison. I'm going to put you in your cot now. 

Sweet dreams. 

Sleep tight.

Good night.